Messy

A messy state of mind leads to messy actions -> bring no good result -> frustration.

Deep breath ……………….

Take a walk outside to detach , I will, have to fetch my baby soon.

Then, sort thoughts out with my hubby, I think my program has grown a little overwhelming for me, need a little reorientation from an outsider, and chubby hubby is the one to turn to.

and then hopefully an organized state of mind again.

My teen-or-so brother showed me a Natalie rapper this morning, an outburst of unreasonable frustration, that has no root and goes no where, just a clump of anger by itself, dead end and useless.

and i got infected by that state of mind.

Yes, it takes time to calm down and get sorted out, even from such a tiny thing can trigger some bad messy day.

I realised I have departed from that teen-or-so state so long ago.

it no longer amused me, or entertain me,

it’s simply stupid as it leads nowhere.

Anger has to drive you to finding its root and hence its solution.

Anger should have a meaning, it is the driving force to find ways to terminate itself. Everything should go in a circle.

If it’s just an outburst that help solve nothing, and show you nothing, then it only feeds your feeling of emptiness and hopelessness, and being stuck and frustration again.

I don’t like having to spend this 10 min sorting out my thoughts and explaining myself my own feelings,

but i need to, to go on the rest of the day.

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