Love is like antique, the older I get, the dearer price I charge.
I remember when i was in secondary school, it didn’t take much. A couple of gazes, a bit of smiles, some random compliments, that was enough to grab my attention. And from then on, the attraction feeds on itself.
‘Does he like me?’
‘Is it my eyes, or my smile, or my dreamy style’
‘Maybe he’ll like long hair …’
‘Will he look at me again today when i walk pass him? Oh sure, most of the time he ‘pretends’ that boys don’t care, but i know he does.’
‘He gave me that look again! Wow, he must be secretly thinking of me.’
‘This word that i overheard, does it conceal some ‘hidden’ liking that he was too shy to speak out?’
‘I’d better hang out in this area often, chances are at he’ll see me.’
And the list goes on.
Teen crushes are cheap (in my days). Didn’t cost much but didn’t give much either. Anyway, i never got a boyfriend in my secondary school so i’d not know what i’d offer had i caught one. But surely it still hurt a good deal, and cost a lot of daydreaming despite of being almost for free.
In my student life, price has gone up.
Apart from smiles, and eyeing, now there’d need to be mobile chatting (mostly sms-ing for me), post mailing (stamps and envelops cost), postcards + e-cards, going out, eating out, flowers (red rose counts as a statement), birthday present, etc. Romance cost stacks up. Less daydreaming with
un-answeredself-answered questions, more analyzing, female friend commenting/ counselling.
Many of my friends got boyfriends, who turn later into husbands in this period. I suffered from heavy ‘left-out single’ syndrome.
After graduation and started to work, real life commitment began.
I got annoyed if some guys just looked, and didn’t say. Attention now is a commodity you can’t afford to sprinkle wastefully. Calculation, calculation, calculation as your time is running short. Pressure is on. Wedding invitations slamming at your face every month. Friends are getting pregnant, babies, when’s my turn?
So now there are strict criteria to screen: job, income, age, education, family background, regions of origin, housing condition, communication style, ambition, etc. The colour of his eyes stops to matter much (well, at most it’s a plus only).
Because now if he wins you, he has much to gain: free laundry, free meals, free babies plus child care, your income, house rent, his self-improvement, etc. It’s not about impressions, or romance any more, it’s trading. Fair-trade, and mutual beneficial cooperation, preferably.
After you got a husband, you relax, you have no need to screen or go through ‘interviews’ any more. But still your price goes up even much higher.
Because you now own a family, are responsible for some extra people (who pees in bed from times to times, and forces you to read the same book ten times in a row), have a (more or less) established life and most of all, you know how to choose a good partner.